blog post #10

I have chosen to review the album Heaven and Hell by Black Sabbath. For those of you who know anything about the band Black Sabbath, you'd know that their lead singer was Ozzy Osbourne. This was true, up until 1979 when Ozzy was fired for being a drunken lay-a-waste. This heralded the inclusion of one Ronnie James Dio, formerly of the band Rainbow. Dio's signature roar echoes throughout every track, destroying all memories of Ozzy's memorable wail. Let's go over each track one by one...
1. Neon Knights: fast paced, great start to signal the reinvention of a band.
2. Children of the Sea: slower, creates a mood of despair.
3. Lady Evil: average track, nothing that stands out.
4. Heaven and Hell: the only song on the album that reminds us of classic Sabbath circa 1970.
5. Wishing Well: Iommi's best guitar work on the album, blistering solos.
6. Die Young: best track on the album, gritty, fast paced.
7. Walk Away: far too poppy to be a heavy metal song, reminiscent of Boston.
8. Lonely is the Word: good closing song, more good Iommi work.

Overall it's a solid album musically, quite worth the time if you're a fan of Ronnie James Dio. For Sabbath fans however, you may just prefer listening to Paranoid one more time.
3 out of 5 satanir pentagrams

blog post #9

I'm sure this script included...

-sledgehammer

-native indian story

-block of wood

-"annie, what are you doing?"

-"god, I love you."

-"don't worry paul, it'll all be over soon."

-hobbling

-paul laying in bed

I bet the movie crew added...

-paul's intense screaming

-annie's outfit

-paul's outfit

-paul's calm demeanor at first

-showing the foot break

-"annie, what ever you are about to do, please don't do it."

-hearing the foot break

-annie's cross necklace

Blog Post #8 (for real)

I like girl singers
Alanis Morissette's my fave
It is Ironic

We should be ashamed
Cheap Trick's music is awful
For shame Illinois

Got to love Ram Jam
You know about Black Betty?
It's their only song

blog post #8

I would have to say that the holiday that I hold favorite in my heart would be Comic Appreciation Day. Of course I use the term day loosely, as this holiday is in fact an all weekend occurence in closest sense of a convention. In the weeks prior to this event, streets and buildings all across the world are immersed in the festive decorations of comic characters. People everywhere will dress up as their favorite comic book characters, everything from superheroes to cartoon strips. The weekend of celebration will include costume contests, debates between Marvel lovers and DC lovers, and all the autographs signings the celebrities can take! The goal is just to consolidate all the comic conventions of the world and combine them into one great big comic-love fest. Imagine Woodstock, but with comics. That's right, I'm talking big time celebration. It'll be the best three days of each year! And in the truest style of comics, everything will be resolved in the end, almost as if by magic. That way, no one has to clean up. What a holiday!

blog post #6

I believe that the act of grinding should be outlawed. It is just so utterly distasteful. It is a lewd and disgusting act that cannot in any just world be described as dancing. The fact that grinding is accepted as a form of dancing is a crime, let alone allowed at any school function. Dancing is supposed to be about beautiful expression of the creative soul, not offensive gestures akin to that of a primitive ape. Kids these days need to learn the classic forms of dancing such as waltz, swing dancing, and even a little salsa for the truly adventurous. I mean, the world itself is unattractive: grinding. It sounds like the noise that my car makes every morning. It is not something that we, as parents, should be condoning in our schools, or anywhere for that matter. A grind-free world will be a much more appealing place to live in. That is why I am demanding that we put this law into effect and get rid of this unholy act once and for all.

blog post # 5

The creature that I have come up with is the caninepede. This monster has the body of your average laborador or retriever but equipped with about 20 pairs of legs. It can grow up to six feet in length, from head to abdomen. It is unable to run, per se, but rather it slinks rapidly across the ground in a snake-like fashion. Its many legs allow for it to climb over things easily or change direction in a heartbeat. The caninepede enjoys living in dark, damp locations. Its diet includes everything from small insects to large house cats. It has excellent senses of smell and hearing. The monster sounds its howl when it finds prey. So if you hear its many leg scuttle while you're out trick-or-treating, it might be too late.

blog post #4

Welcome, ladies and gentlemen to this blog post advertisment. I am here to show you an incredibly rare artifact, previously thought to be only a myth, a cell phone that is unable to text! That's right, we are offering perhaps one of the last phones in existence that doesn't include this hastle of a feature. No more carpal tunnel from all that typing on those tiny buttons. No more developing of arthritis from the constant mashing of number pads. Avoid all those tedious messages from friends you don't really like. Avoid all those boring conversations from members of the opposite sex about stuff you don't really care about. Your parents don't know where you are? Give them a call instead. No service? Well then you're pretty much screwed, but at least it'll probably be a situation to look back at and laugh. Hurry up though, because before long, this product will surely be done away with for being obsolete.